Right around the beginning of 2019 I was doing an off again, on again “self guided healing journey”. Really, it came as a suggested read from my husband, in the form of a small book of 30 “lessons”. Little did I know it would be the most interesting set of lessons I have ever taken on, and many times over for I keep learning anew from it.
Some people call it shadow work, and there are other names too, but really any healing journey, awakening, ascension, spiritual journey work comes down to this: it is a condensed version of therapy. To top it off, most of the time it happens without a person to guide you through the sessions. I would recommend having at least 1 person of a rational nature to bounce ideas off of.
Anyway, thru this – I have figured out MANY great, wonderful and magical things, and more importantly – many not so awesome things about myself, and of course, other people and to my astonishment – a whole universe of what I realized that I don’t know … and it has now lined up to be read page by page.
I wish I had begun reading the book sooner to be honest, but even as such, it is now more clear to me every day – I wouldn’t have been able to figure it out before now anyway, so it’s best it waited until the whole world stood still for 2 weeks going on 4 years. Turns out, it took the world to stop for me to start.
Before I began lesson 1 – One of the first things I did was to write my intention of the journey and physically tack it to my wall as a reminder when I lost my way. I forgot to read it sometimes, as I invariably have lost my way many times.
My Intention is: To commit to finding strength, ridding the self of unneeded past, to become a better person and inspire others through example.
Looking back from near mid 2023 – I see that I have found strength in this intention. It helped keep me committed to looking within myself. Even if as I said, I forgot it sometimes.
A quick note: Shadow work cautions; I want to make sure this helps not harms.
I need to caution you tho: There are a few unexpected pit falls that you need to know before you begin this type of work:
1. You do not need to rid yourself of your past, it is no longer a goal of mine. Really that part is rewritten as Ridding the self of the stress of the past. For it was very much needed as a guide~ to help me understand myself.
2. I cross my heart to tell the truth, it bears to mention that there is a real danger of staying to much in the past, I have fallen into that trap a few times, but when I realize that pattern too – I begin to apply the understanding to that, and what ever I am stuck in remembering – I can move through it completely. Doing this I have found that I am able to move forward with more grace, compassion and understanding for myself and others.
3. This should not be done alone in cases of illness or physical/mental/emotional distress. See a doctor if you need to. Even if you believe you are stable – Don’t do this alone, some of it is deeply soul level emotional. Have someone check on you.
So far, along a solid 3 years of becoming more in tune with the world in general – I can admit – I am satisfied with the balance because I can be a better example of the values I hold dear while it leads me along towards my goals. I don’t believe I was a bad example of a person, but I want to help people more. It is deep in my heart that I do. And, I know that to help others – I really had to figure out why I felt like I needed to snap out of my own world bubble..Therein lies the answer to a lot more than I had bargained for.
The first part of healilng journeys are usually working with a book to go through the steps, like I did. Or. To be honest now a days: growing is googling – all the feelings – thoughts – rabbit holes – tricks of the mind subjects deep in the middle of the night. Regardless, I am fairly satisfied my values have really solidified, and while I still live fairly close to my dream life in my mind. The growing does not stop. The edges will always spread now. .
Values are the things we find in our core. Values are beliefs that are 100% true 100% of the time. Things like: There is no one like me. Not things like: My hair is ugly.
Here are some examples of values I believe about me: I can change my perspective, view and opinions, but I am still full of love, compassion and hope. I want to help others heal, and there are many ways to help them do that.
One of them is sharing my story…